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Saddletank
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 09.28.06
Location: On your case
Posts: 10069 |
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Have you tried talking to the Samaritans?
Here in the UK no "assistance" groups are church-related, unless you actually go to a church, they are all either govt funded or volunteer groups/charities. I don't know the situation in Canada but I would not expect the church to have its fingers in every pie.
I would imagine there are a good few help groups online; have you tried an internet search?
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Isakaya High School Roleplaying Info
"An old man like me stands no chance fighting against a high school girl in her underwear" - Oshino Meme, Nekomonogatari (Kuro)
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 09.01.2016, 04:06 AM |
   
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foreignfilmfreak
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location: Japan
Posts: 7589 |
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What is Samaritans?
I've been googling but it's kind of hard to find ones specifically for what I'm looking for for some reason.. A lot out there is for those still in the relationship, not so much the after part. Still looking though.
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| 09.01.2016, 08:53 AM |
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Saddletank
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 09.28.06
Location: On your case
Posts: 10069 |
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| 09.01.2016, 10:42 AM |
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foreignfilmfreak
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location: Japan
Posts: 7589 |
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I'm feeling a bit better now, thinking more clearly. Had a workshop last night for teaching in Japan and that helped tremendously. We talked about our weaknesses and strengths. They don't know what I've been going through but it just.. helped a lot, both with looking towards the future and finding something to motivate and fulfill me.
I really need to work on my self confidence and self esteem. After seeing how much one therapy session changed one of my girls this summer, I think it might be worth it. I don't want to feel held back any longer.
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| 09.02.2016, 11:32 AM |
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Nausicaa_Cat
Baron
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location:
Posts: 3198 |
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FFF I'm so sorry you've been feeling that way! I went through some depression when I was younger and though it was never to the point that I was suicidal, I found that for the longest time I just wasn't able to vocalise what I was feeling and wasn't able to seek help. So I think the fact that you're actually doing so and being proactive about this issue is incredible! You are an amazing, inspiring person as always. Let me know if you ever want to talk more in private 
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| 09.04.2016, 04:49 PM |
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Seiji Amasawa
Warawara
Registration Date: 07.10.07
Location: Australia
Posts: 162 |
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quote:
Originally posted by foreignfilmfreak
I'm feeling a bit better now, thinking more clearly. Had a workshop last night for teaching in Japan and that helped tremendously. We talked about our weaknesses and strengths. They don't know what I've been going through but it just.. helped a lot, both with looking towards the future and finding something to motivate and fulfill me.
I really need to work on my self confidence and self esteem. After seeing how much one therapy session changed one of my girls this summer, I think it might be worth it. I don't want to feel held back any longer.
I train/go to the gym a lot in my spare time. Yes my job is about having a high level of fitness but I can tell you fitness helps a lot with what you’re talking about. Trust me when I say this give it a go, go to the gym with a friend or see a personnel trainer. Really give it a go, set a goal to at least go three or four times a week. Don't think of it as a chore and challenge yourself every time you go. You will not regret it, and actually find you have a lot more confidence.
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"I have come to see with eyes unclouded by hate"
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| 09.05.2016, 12:06 AM |
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foreignfilmfreak
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location: Japan
Posts: 7589 |
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Thank you, NC. <3
Seiji, unfortunately going to a gym isn't an option for me. I don't live near one, and there's a slim chance of my area ever getting one.  I don't have any friends to go with either. Not being able to drive kind of sucks..
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| 09.06.2016, 12:11 AM |
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Kazegami
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 08.19.07
Location: a world of pure imagination
Posts: 7025 |
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Spam attack. o_o Never seen one this bad.
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My Anime List
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| 09.07.2016, 12:45 AM |
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husky51
The Old Guy
Registration Date: 03.17.08
Location: Southern California
Posts: 12804 |
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| 09.07.2016, 10:13 PM |
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arren18
Administrator
Registration Date: 08.15.06
Location: Edinburgh
Posts: 10671 |
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They usually disappear a bit faster, don't they? I suppose none of the mods are available right now.
Unrelated:
Kaz, have you seen much of the typhoons yet? This morning was pretty stormy in Osaka.
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Post last edited by arren18 on 09.08.2016, 12:01 AM.
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| 09.07.2016, 11:55 PM |
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Kazegami
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 08.19.07
Location: a world of pure imagination
Posts: 7025 |
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Ah, they seem to have been mainly passing us by. We've had some spells of heavy rain but nothing more. A couple of wet and windy days would be quite nice, actually...
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My Anime List
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| 09.08.2016, 02:52 AM |
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foreignfilmfreak
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location: Japan
Posts: 7589 |
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I realized my ex is a narcissistic psychopath and it's been super fun. I never thought a psychopath was like that..
We were driving home today and the radio announcer was talking about a study that said if you like to drink gin then you're more likely to be a psychopath. My ex LOVED gin. He would spend a ridiculous amount of money on high quality gin. But that's a little beside the point. I just immediately went "oh my god, he was totally a psychopath".
I think I realized this while we were dating but was too afraid to admit the truth..
When we watched dramas together, he always marveled the psychopathic/sociopathic characters. He loved them and thought they were so interesting. I kind of brushed it off, but it bothered me with one drama in particular because of how much I did not like the sociopathic boyfriend. The girl knew something was "off" about him and kept pushing to figure it out. I realized I'm that girl. It's kind of scary how much I relate to her now and the "trap" he set her up in.
I'm saying this after looking into it because my friend whom I opened up to noted that it sounded like he was a narcissist but she couldn't be sure. I finally decided to read up on it and it fit my situation to a T.
Post last edited by foreignfilmfreak on 09.09.2016, 12:09 AM.
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| 09.08.2016, 11:49 PM |
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saviour2012
Baron
Registration Date: 02.24.12
Location: Dhaka,Bangladesh
Posts: 1749 |
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quote:
Originally posted by foreignfilmfreak
I realized my ex is a narcissistic psychopath and it's been super fun. I never thought a psychopath was like that..
We were driving home today and the radio announcer was talking about a study that said if you like to drink gin then you're more likely to be a psychopath. My ex LOVED gin. He would spend a ridiculous amount of money on high quality gin. But that's a little beside the point. I just immediately went "oh my god, he was totally a psychopath".
I think I realized this while we were dating but was too afraid to admit the truth..
When we watched dramas together, he always marveled the psychopathic/sociopathic characters. He loved them and thought they were so interesting. I kind of brushed it off, but it bothered me with one drama in particular because of how much I did not like the sociopathic boyfriend. The girl knew something was "off" about him and kept pushing to figure it out. I realized I'm that girl. It's kind of scary how much I relate to her now and the "trap" he set her up in.
I'm saying this after looking into it because my friend whom I opened up to noted that it sounded like he was a narcissist but she couldn't be sure. I finally decided to read up on it and it fit my situation to a T.
i think it is a bit more complicated than that. the psychology of people is not universal truth. a pattern might or might not fit with each people.
__________________
Watch everything but only take the good things from it
Ask, think and learn. Because the more we know the more we grow.
Watching the wrong to happen is the same as commiting the wrong.
If it looks like things are forcing you to be creative, Then be creative.
its a uniquely Miyazaki film, one only he could make and its uniqueness places it beyond being easily critiqued.[About Porco Rosso]
taken from a quote of Saddletank and Orphic Okapi
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| 09.09.2016, 06:05 AM |
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foreignfilmfreak
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location: Japan
Posts: 7589 |
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No, it definitely is more complicated. He fits all the patterns. I've just been reading up a lot on it and finding it fits my situation but that I managed to leave before the damage got worse. My intuition always knew but I kept making excuses. My skin crawled when I finally acknowledged it.
My ex was trying to marry me as soon as possible and move me to his parents' house in his home country. He would get mad at me for not "compromising" my goals for him. I felt extremely off about the idea.. He did not want me to work. He told me he could support me and I could work on writing. I still felt really off about this and I'm someone who would like to be a housewife someday. Now I'm scared to think, what would have happened to me if I had done this? I'm glad I followed my intuition on this part. Especially because my immediate thought was, "What if something happens and I can't afford the expensive ticket back home?" I was terrified of being trapped.
It all seems incredibly subtle, but really believe me when I say he was. I think the scariest thing for me was noticing he actually does not have empathy... he pretends he does. I only noticed this after he got his job he has now. Yet he accused me of lacking in empathy towards understanding him. I'm an empath. That says it all for me..
Post last edited by foreignfilmfreak on 09.09.2016, 10:04 AM.
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| 09.09.2016, 10:02 AM |
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makc
Ohmu
Registration Date: 07.12.16
Location:
Posts: 437 |
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saviour2012, when a girl says her ex is a narcissistic psychopath, her ex is a narcissistic psychopath. you just do not question things like this, if you want to stay friends with her 
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It's now very common to hear people say, 'I'm rather offended by that.' As if that gives them certain rights. It's actually nothing more... than a whine. 'I find that offensive.' It has no meaning; it has no purpose; it has no reason to be respected as a phrase. 'I am offended by that.' Well, so loving what - Stephen Fry.
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| 09.09.2016, 09:06 PM |
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saviour2012
Baron
Registration Date: 02.24.12
Location: Dhaka,Bangladesh
Posts: 1749 |
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quote:
Originally posted by makc
saviour2012, when a girl says her ex is a narcissistic psychopath, her ex is a narcissistic psychopath. you just do not question things like this, if you want to stay friends with her
I dont think that is true makc. We have had many many interesting discussions in this forum. read the older threads in the general discussion section. Here people mostly speak honestly. I understand your point of view that it is possible that a person may be biased when judging someone specially someone's ex, however i think that is a part of being human. no one really is neutral. And i think many things happened in the past that were far more serious than this, still we(members of tavern) get along fine. so that is not an issue (i could argue about it if i wanted and saw it fitting)
__________________
Watch everything but only take the good things from it
Ask, think and learn. Because the more we know the more we grow.
Watching the wrong to happen is the same as commiting the wrong.
If it looks like things are forcing you to be creative, Then be creative.
its a uniquely Miyazaki film, one only he could make and its uniqueness places it beyond being easily critiqued.[About Porco Rosso]
taken from a quote of Saddletank and Orphic Okapi
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| 09.10.2016, 02:52 PM |
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foreignfilmfreak
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location: Japan
Posts: 7589 |
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Saviour's right and I didn't see anything wrong with what he had said. Of course, it all runs a lot deeper than anything I've said about my ex.
There's a lot of reasons why I think he was. I don't say it out of hatred towards him. I don't like thinking badly of anyone. It was more a sad realization of his character and the fear/relief of no longer being with him because I knew something was off. I just thought I was crazy and kept making excuses for him.
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| 09.10.2016, 11:55 PM |
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Saddletank
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 09.28.06
Location: On your case
Posts: 10069 |
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This is a scary thing to read and a real revelation. I applaud you for being so honest and brave to speak of such personal things here.
Was this the boyfriend that all your "friends" too the side of when you split?
__________________
Isakaya High School Roleplaying Info
"An old man like me stands no chance fighting against a high school girl in her underwear" - Oshino Meme, Nekomonogatari (Kuro)
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| 09.11.2016, 06:10 AM |
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foreignfilmfreak
Miyazaki's Best Friend
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location: Japan
Posts: 7589 |
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quote:
Originally posted by Saddletank
This is a scary thing to read and a real revelation. I applaud you for being so honest and brave to speak of such personal things here.
Was this the boyfriend that all your "friends" too the side of when you split?
Thanks, Saddle. I sometimes wonder whether I shouldn't speak up but at the same time I don't see the point of keeping that realization inside. Especially after I saw how much it was hurting me not to speak out.
Yes, same guy. I'm not the only one who noticed he was a narcissist. One of my good friends he had triangulated realized he was and said others did too, so it wasn't just us. I know he's been smearing my name. The more powerful he gets the more I'm concerned whether he will try to ruin my name.
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| 09.11.2016, 03:08 PM |
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Nausicaa_Cat
Baron
Registration Date: 10.02.06
Location:
Posts: 3198 |
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Hi all, I've made the definite decision today that I'm going to apply to JET! I was wondering whether any of you who have been through the process wouldn't mind maybe PMing me some top tips you might have?
I'd be very grateful
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| 09.12.2016, 03:18 PM |
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